The Intergalactic Black Market

Ahh, ‘tis my first story since the end of the earth. It’s sure great to be back here. See I was trapped in dreamland for a while until my robotic friend made a deal with the plutopians to trade me for him. The plutopians believed him to be very new technology so they agreed. And here I am back at the computer. You know, on the last day of the earth, (Before it ended) Jake told me that he would call me at 1:01 to tell me that the world did not end. However, he didn’t call me. Must’ve died. Anyway, Cody Walsh did call me. Told me that Jake couldn’t call and he decided to call instead. He said he was bored. (Did you know before I corrected this the ‘bored’ was spelled ‘board’. You know, like wipe of board?) ’Maybe that’s because almost everybody else in the world was dead. His cat somehow survived though. (Could it be possible that it was the cat that killed everyone on earth? It’s man-eating you know. It was biting Cody when he called) I heard the cat in the background when Cody called. Anyway, shall we start this story or what? Just to let you know, when I refer to dollars, what I mean is energy pods. Those are what aliens use as money.
Somewhere in the Milky Way galaxy about 700 light years from earth floated an Advanced Plutonian warship. Following it were three smaller Plutopian trade ships each filled with over a quadrillion earthling brains. Some human brains, some animal brains they all lay frozen in colossal cryonic freeze chambers aboard the ships.
"I’ll sell this piano to you. See? It has an electric generator in it and it’ll electrocute anyone who tries to play it. It’s got top of the line antique pink paint used on it to. They don’t make this stuff anymore. I’ll sell it to ya for 90 million dollars."
"90 million eh? NO."
"Come on, it’s a great deal!"
"NO, idiot. But I’ll take the piano."
"Well then pay up!" The Alien who refused to buy the piano raised a laser and killed the other alien.
"Ha, Ha! I can’t wait to try this thing out. Well, can’t try it now, I’ve got ‘o meeting with Pluto in a couple of minutes," The alien looked towards the sky catching a glimpse of the slick, blue, Plutopian ship hovering above. "Ah, that must be them. I best get ready. I hear they’re doing serious business. It’s not like them to be selling goods at the black market!" Slowly the spacecraft began to land. The head Plutopian walked out followed by two Plutopian guards armed with advanced laser guns.
"Bobwadner! I see you’ve made it on time as always" the head Plutopian said as he continued to walk across the metal floor. He pulled up a chair and sat down.
"You know I’m always on time!"
"Yes, I do know that. That is why I always pick you to buy my goods from me first hand. You’ve proven to show yourself trustworthy and fair, not to mention you kindly choose to be discreet about where you keep the goods stashed. Orbiting above are three ships locked down by code sensitive keys. Aboard them are over 80 quintillion brains. I’m willing to sell them to you for 1000 dollars a piece. Deal?"
"A thousand dollars huh? Well, see, I may own a large sum of money in the bank due to my businesses, but I’m not rich Mr. Plutopian. 100 dollars a piece would be to much for me."
"You won’t even buy some?"
"Sorry, but I never go the hang of brain cloning. I’m not interested." The alien got up form his chair and walked away. The head Plutopian stayed in his seat and rubbed his chin staring down at the ground. Then, out of nowhere he got up and threw the chair across the room.
"DAMN!!"
"Sir, what's the problem?"
"Shut up guard! I spent a lot of money on that tractor beam. I spent far over 90,00 quintillion dollars preparing it as well," He paused for a moment, "The brains were supposed to pay for all the money...But nobody will buy them!" The Plutopian continued to rub his chin, a tall man in a black suit walked out of the shadows of the metal building. He looked almost human except for two features. His fingernails were green...and his iris’s, instead of being green, blue, hazel, brown, or blue-green, were a dark shade of purple. If it were not for these to characteristics, he'd have most likely been mistaken for a human.
"I’m sorry for eavesdropping, but I believe I heard you were selling brains. I was wondering if I might by some." He said quietly.
"Oh, no problem at all. I’ve had plenty of people eavesdrop on me before. Now...about the brains. You wanna buy them?"
"Yes, see, I own a huge body replacement company. You know, one of those places that supply extra arms in case you get yours shot off? Anyway, with these brains, I can fill in the head of each body and have any army of slaves to work for me. How much do you want for them?"
"Want? OH, about 1000 dollars a piece."
"To much, how ‘bout 500."
"No, that’s to little. Tell you what, I’ll lower the price to eight hundred."
"650"
"Eh...700"
"675"
"Deal!" The two aliens shook hands, then the purple nailed guy took a wad of money out from his pocket. He handed it to the Plutopian and the head guy dropped a pair of keys into the purple nailed mans hands.
"Those are the keys to ship A. You bought around 1 quintillion brains and I thank you. I plan to try and sell the rest of them at the main market in the center of the universe." The Plutopian once again boarded his ship and started to hover away. The purple nailed man watched until the warship was out of sight, then hooked the trade ship filled with brains onto another, larger ship. He got onto the larger ship and started to fly into the distance. On the side of the ship, there were words that read Intergalactic Police. Planet Xonver. Did I mention murdering entire planets by tractor beam is illegal?


Location: Earth—San Francisco
Silence.

Location: Earth—Chicago
Silence.

Location: Earth—New York
Silence.

Location: Earth—Wheaten, Illinois

"Yahoo! It’s the second to last day of school! I wonder if I should have tamales or chocolate covered ants for breakfast today? Maybe I’ll have both, after all, it is the second to last day of school!" Screamed Cody Walsh while inside his house. He switched on the TV, but the picture did not appear.
"Hmm, my TV must be broke! Ooh well, I’ll just rob the town bank and buy a new one!" Cody went over and turned on the radio. There was silence.
"Wow! What a coincidence, my radio is broken to! I’ll have to take more money than I thought." HE looked at his watch then started to open the front door. Some old guy on a motorcycle rode in through the door and crashed into the opposite wall of Cody’s house.
"I’m sorry Mr. I----Oh my gosh, you’re dead! Yo must’ve had a heart attack! I’ll call 911 right away." Cody ran over to the phone and dialed the emergency number. There as silence on the other end.
"MOM!!!! Something wrong with the phone, I dialed 911 to call the hospital cause this one old guy crashed into our house and is dead, but there was no answer. I’m going over to the bank to steal some money so we can buy a new one. Oh, and we need a new TV, Radio, and microwave. I tried to cook my tamales but they wouldn’t all fit into the microwave. I’ll buy a bigger one. Okay!" There as silence.
"Hello!! MOM!" More silence. Cody walked down the stairs of his house and into his basement. On the floor, lay 20 people dead. Among those people...were his mom and sister. Cody looked at the mess of bodies, then said,
"I guess they died of Heart attacks too."


Location: Jupiter

"ANTI GRAVITY GENERATORS BOOTING UP, STANDBY."
"Oh well, I guess instead of heading for earth I’ll be heading for Jupiter. I wonder if they’ll have a McDonalds there. I mean, its world wide so why shouldn’t it be universal?" Miguel opened a can of Beer and surveyed the landing of his spacecraft. IF the ship hit the ground to hard, there would be a huge explosion to big to even compare to the force of any type of bomb. I think Sean Graham told me once that if you dropped a marshmallow on Jupiter, the force it would hit the ground would be equal to that of an Atomic bomb. Imagine the force of a 90-ton spacecraft hitting the ground. Oh, did I ever tell you about the book when there’s this giant ogre that turns into a giant werewolf whenever he decides to drink this special beer-like drink that is now made out of rotten fish? I didn’t? Oh well, I’m telling you now. You should read it; it’s a lot like Eragon.

Location: Police center

"Hmm, that’s weird, everybody here must’ve died of heart attacks as well. Not to mention the guys at the forestation...I mean fire station... and the guys at the hospital. I just went over there and checked. Hey, maybe the radio here works." Cody said switching the radio inside the police station on.
"Hello everybody and welcome to the News Hour with Jim Lehrer. Today on the News hour tonight, we have nothing. If you’re listening to his broadcast right now, I urge you to travel to Springfield. In case you haven’t noticed everybody has died. I am a survivor and so are you. Come to Springfield and we’ll be together."
"Hey Jim, what are you talking about not having anything on the news hour. I could be news, we could have an interview!""What? Quiet, we’re on live Radio!""Please!"
"Fine, Fine, what’s your name Mr."
"Ha, HA, my name’s Mr. Norm. Every day, me and the poor guy, go over to he rich guys house and we have a fart fest! We’re running around farting everywhere. See the rich guy has fans to blow the smell around. All three of us love farting, we’re big fart guys! Sometimes, we decide to go to the poor guy’s house. But he poor guy doesn’t have bathroom so we have to fart in the kitchen. It gets stinky and the house is so small, the house fills with gas. We accidentally blew it up once. The rich guy had to buy the poor guy a new one. Yeah, we love farting!"
"Mr. Norm! That’ was highly inappropriate!"
"There’s nobody listening anyway! Besides, it was true"
"I don’t care, I’m getting us off the air right now!...Thank you everyone for listening. This has been the News Hour with Jim Lehrer. Good bye, and good night!" Cody scratched his butt, then grabbed the keys out of one of the dead policeman’s jacket. He stole a police car and began to drive down the toll way (You no longer had to pay a toll. Almost everybody was dead) towards Springfield. I’ve got something to say! I just want t bring to your attention...The Hetty site. See it’s a Website on the computer about hetty. Well, it’s not exactly just about Hetty it’s also about Jerry Perry. And Mush brain boy. You should check it out, here’s the address: http colon slash slash dot hetty site dot blogspot dot com. If you want it in computer terms, and of terms of which you should type in on the address bar, here you go: http://hettysite.blogspot.com Oh yeah, the Hetty stories are posted on the site too. The indenting got all messed up though. Sorry.

Location: Inside Hetty’s mind (Dreamland)

"Something’s wrong."
"What? No, sir, nothing’s wrong, we’re just flying in space towards some foreign planet to be safe from Pluto."
"NO, Something’s wrong. That blue light, I feel sort of floaty."
"Floaty?"
"Quickly, take this gun and shoot me with it!"
"Boss! Why?"
"If this is real life, I’ll die. You can bring me back to life with one of the lives. If I don’t die...it means Pluto has taken our brains."
"Sir"
"Shoot me!" The plumber looked at Hetty, raised the gun, and shot him.
The bullet headed towards Hetty’s skull, however at the last moment, it vanished. It never even touched the skin.
"There you go! Pluto has taken our brains; you couldn’t kill me because my brain would not know what it would feel like to die. Neither of us really have any body."
"So what do we do?"
"Nothing really, just remember that this is not reality. Murder people, eat all you want, get drunk, blow up places. Nothing is real, you can’t die, (Cause you’re pretty much already dead. Al that would happen is you’d loose consciences. And maybe not even that. Depends how you’re dying.) And you can’t injure yourself. (You don’t have real body parts. Only a brain. You might think you have injured yourself. But not really) Enjoy it, there’s nothing we can do to escape."
"I see, well, see ya Hetty!" the man ran off. Hetty watched him leave then thought to himself; the plutopians were third most advanced life from in the galaxy. However, even they made mistakes. Somebody would rescue him, somebody.

Location: Springfield

Cody Walsh knocked on the door of Illinois city hall. An old man answered the door.
"Fantastic! Yet another survivor, this is the 11h one yet. My gosh, thank goodness you heard my broadcast. Come with me, you must be famished. Want any food? A drink perhaps?"
"NO thank you"
"NO? Well, then. Here’s a list of the other survivors. You might want to looked threw it. And again, Thank goodness..." Jim sniffled ten rubbed his nose, "thank goodness you survived. I thought I had lost you."
"Excuse me? Do I know you from somewhere besides the radio? Do you now me?"
"What? OH, err.... No. I don’t know you. I’m just...glad you have survived. By, read up Jake." Jim Lehrer walked out of the room and closed the door behind him. Jake looked at the piece of paper with the survivor’s names written on it. Here’s what it showed:


The survivors and reasons for surviving

A tiger from China
The tractor beam did not affect tigers. It was one a Pluto’s many errors, the rest of them simply died of complete shock.

Jim Lehrer
His ears were too small to allow the brain to squeeze out

Mr. Norm (Fart committee member)
Because his butt whole was so entirely large, the tractor beam tried to pull his brain out through it. However, the brain became lodged in his intestines and stayed there. IT returned to his head after the beam left.

The rich guy (Fart committee member)
Same as Mr. Norm

The poor guy (Fart committee member)
Same as Mr. Norm

A nameless man. (He insists we call him ‘the purple suited man’)
Hid inside a Plutopian tractor beam resistant building. So happens to be called Hetty headquarters. Hetty wasn’t sure if it would be completely tractor beam proof and decide to leave the planet anyway. He should’ve stayed. If he had, he’d still be alive. Anyway, Hetty had limited room in his ship so he left most of his men on earth. Only his most important men got a room within the building.

Some boy that is trapped in a base drum
Drum seemed to have been Plutopian tractor beam resistant as well. It was made in Korea. We have not been able to get the boy out for the drum is sealed with a code lock. We don’t know the code.

Cody Walsh
His brain is mush. The Plutopian tractor beam did not pick up insolid objects.

Jim Lehrer reentered the room.
"You read the list?"
"Yeah, but there’s only eight people."
"The rest haven’t signed the paper yet. Anyway, we’d better get a move on. The men have already loaded the base drum into the SUV. You should get on, we’re headin’ for Cambridge."
"What! Cambridge? What’s going on?"
"Oh didn’t I tell you? The purple suited man said that there’s a fine base in good shape up in Cambridge Maryland. We’re heading there to set up camp. After we go there, we’ll pick up some more helicopters and jeeps. Head over to NASA and steal a space ship. We’ll fly to Mars and take better one there. I hear it’s inhabitable there now."
"The purple suited man? Why are you believing him?"
"Well, I wouldn’t usually, but I had my Iraqi friend fly over there in our helicopter and he said it looked fine. Michael Jackson’s with him."
"Thank goodness for that."
"That reminds me. We got a new survivor. Mr. Norm stopped over at Burger King to steal a few burgers when he was chased away by this burger King employee. A New recruit to our force. The more the better, I’m planning war on Pluto."
"Mr. Lehrer I---"
"Just get in the car. It’s safer in Maryland. This building could explode any second." Cody climbed into he car and the group of survivors sped down the expressway/toll way/highway/freeway/road/street/pavement/exc.

Location: Cambridge, Maryland

"9:00AM automatic Sprinklers ON for 1 hour. Breakfast for Hetty being prepared. Three eggs with grapefruit juice and four overcooked 5 inch strips of bacon." Inside Hetty’s not so secret base, automatic machinery continued to operate as usual. The grass around the grounds remained green and fires within 5 miles were put out by an automatic fire station in the building. This secret base was one of few buildings still standing. Because of the sudden death of so many people, car crashes, plane crashes, power plant explosions, and train crashes caused many building to catch fire or explode. Without a fire station, the fires were never put out. They raged on until entire cities burned to the ground. It kind of shows you how advanced Hetty is, doesn’t it. Reminds you of garbage bags, right? Hetty is like Hefty. Hefty is a type of garbage bag.
"9:01 daily security code input not typed in. Booting up Artificial life form security guards and notifying all other bases. Shutting down underground train systems plus notifying Amishland inc. Notifying Mars. Emergency actions acted." Inc case you don’t know what’s going on, I think I should tell you. Don’t you think? Let me start to explain. Everyday, it is up to Hetty to type in the secret Access Code into the Computer at twelve O’clock sharp. He has created this system, so that if he were to be captured and his base taken over, the people who had just defeated would not be able to operate the base and the base would automatically shut down. Robots would all be deployed and al his allies signaled. With this system, it is extremely hard to take over Hetty’s base and still attack his allies by surprise. Wanna here something? Free checks for life? Over my butler’s dead body. I saw that on a billboard in Chicago. Bit confusing ain’t it?
Reminds me of Marsh mellows.

Location: Planet Xonver

"What’s the deal chief? Can we arrest them?
"Sorry champ. Can’t exactly arrest ‘em yet. Pluto is the most advanced planet in this Galaxy, next to us and Planet Zoonerr. We don’t have enough proof to call in the universal police and I think it would be a bad idea to start a fight with that planet. With tractor beam laser at their hands, who knows what they could do to us. I’d say we wait and get more evidence of the crime."
"More evidence!? We’ve got human brains bought from them for @#$% sake! It’s illegal to harm Un-advanced planets without lasers and they did it. What more do you need."
"I want written documents. Don’t worry son, I’ve got 5 spies down at the Plutopian trading docks right now. They’ll get into the Plutopian headquarters and steal some papers. In the mean time, we’d better head over to Pluto and buy the rest of the brains. I’m going to create bodies for them and put them back on earth. The one third we already have already are in the sleeping chamber with their bodies. They should wake up soon. Come, son. We’ve got trading to do." The two aliens left the room and boarded a ship. As they left the premises, there was a noise from one of the rooms. On the door of the room, was a sign. SLEEPING CHAMBER. DO NOT ENTER. HUMAN LIFEFORMS INSIDE. Inside the room, a tall man with a white beard got up from the hard floor. HE rubbed his eyes and looked around the place. After of moment of new curiosity, the tall man jumped into the air and let out a whoop of Joy.

Location: Jupiter

"My new fellow Jupitoans! I know that you sometimes like to be very stupid. And often times act like idiots! I know this, and I’ve decided to teach you the ways of the humans. You have worked hard to survive on a planet of so much gravity. You have developed an advanced system of anti-gravitating, and have a very interesting way of growing food. Are you guys willing to take my offer and let me teach you the polite ways and manners of humans? All of this just to become an army working just of me?"
"RA, RA, RA!! We Join!!!! WE, WE, WE!!!! GIMME! GIMME! GIMME!" Miguel looked down at the crowd of orange pancake like creatures that lay before him. They shouted and cheered and threw gooey pizza food at him. This was their way of showing that they appreciated what you had just said. They didn’t know better. This civilization did not have a system of manners or politeness. He, Miguel Aguado, was going to teach them. (Doesn’t that phrase remind you of Beatles? Did you know that Jake Berry thinks ‘You smell like rotten tacos’ is a common phrase?)
"Anyway, I see you like my deal. Before I teach you, you must help me get what I want. Please board my ship, Thank you" Thousands of the orange pancake people walked onto the ship. They didn’t exactly walk for Jupitoans don’t walk, they sort of slither on their bellies. See it’s hard for person to walk a Jupiter, the gravity is so great, and it’s impossible for a human to do it unless they have on an anti-gravititator. The Gravity on Jupiter also explains the weird shape of Jupitoans.
You know what? Think is the end of my 7th page. I’d better wrap this up, can’t let it go above 12. 12’s my limit, I’ve only had one story go above twelve pages and nobody liked it ‘cause it was to long. Let’s switch our location to...Cambridge Maryland. Hetty Headquarters.
I’ve got a commercial for you if you want to hear it. Hear it goes.
There are two men standing in the middle of nowhere. One man (Probably the leader) was accompanied by two men with their face covered and an old car. The other stood in front of a crowd of people with red umbrellas.
"I thought I told you to come alone."
"Err...I did."
"Then who are they?" The man pointed to a crowd of people standing him.
"They? They’re my network. They’re in case I should have to call, text, or contact anyone."
"Oh really?......You get service down here, cause I’m always doing business down here and I gotta tell you, it’s crap-shit. Hey you! You work down by the docks?!"


"Is this the place purple guy?"
"Yep. My boss’s superb headquarters."
"I see, well, let’s have a look around shall we?" The 7 survivors had met up with the Iraqi and Michael Jackson at Annapolis, the capitol. There, they had all rode in the car towards Cambridge. Now, the 9 survivors walked through the doors of Hetty’s control central. (I say 9 because the boy in the drum was still in the car, and the tiger was still in the car as well.
"Hello! Anybody here!" Called Jim Lehrer into the metal building. He opened his mouth to call again, when a gun was pushed against his throat.
"DON"T MOVE WHOEVER YOU ARE. THIS IS HETTY HEADQUARTERS AND YOU HAVE TO BUISNESS HERE. ARE YOU ALONE OR WITH ACCOPLICES?"
"A-alone"
"OH REALLY. THEN WHO ARE THEY?" The robot that had just threatened Jim turned him to face the other way. The 8 other men lay on the floor half-dead.
"AS YOU CAN SEE, THIS FACILITY HAS HIGH SECURTY. HETTY HAS NOT RESPONDED FOR THE LAST 24 HOURS AND BECAUSE OF THAT, WE HAVE BEEN GUARDING TOP NOTCH. I SUGGEST YOU COOROPERATE OR YOU CAN SAY GOOD BYE TO YOUR FRIENDS."
"S-sorry. I thought I could get helicopters and weapons here, As well as jeeps. I was planning to head for NASA so I could get to Mars. I can get better ships there. I want to stop Pluto and get the humans back."
"SO YOU ARE A GOOD CAUSE! GREAT, CAUSE I NEED MEN. I AND THE REST OF THE ROBOTS HERE ARE PROGRAMMED TO RESCUE OUR MASTER AT ALL COSTS. WE CAN SUPPLY YOU WITH HISPS ANS LASERS. NOT TO MENTION WE CAN IVE YOU CONTACT TO US. BY GOING AND DEFEATING PLUTO YOU CAN SAVE US THE TROUBLE NOT TO MENTION OUR LIVES. FEEL FREE TO TAKE ANYTHING IN THE BUILDING. REMEMBER, I"M WATCHING. IF YOU PLAN TO ABANDONE US..." The robot took a long knife from inside his chest.
"YOU GET THE PICTURE. I REALLY DO HATE TALKING IN CAPS LOCK ALL THE TIME."
The men decided to take 5 jeeps, 7 chainsaws, 2 axes, 1 drill, 1 hacksaw, and some rope. They were going to abandon the NASA plan and use a Plutopian space ship but found out that Hetty had none stared away. The original plan would have to work. With some Plutopian technology they found they managed to open the base drum. As the top opened, a boy popped out.
"Hi guy’s, got any chicken potpie?’
Whoops, sorry. Forgot something. While they searched the building for supplies, they found another human survivor. His name, well I actually don’t really know his name. All I know is that he was Cody’s father. He used to work for Hetty inside an underground Wheaties factory before Hetty evacuated him to the safety of the headquarters. Secretly of course. The working at the factory and the evacuating part.

Location: Pluto

"What do you mean they’re not for sale?"
"I already told you. We’ve got new plans for the brains. We’re going to turn them into slaves to work on our new Algae plantations. You’re the ones who gave us the idea"
"Please reconsider. I’m willing to pay good money."
"80,000 dollars a piece?"
"Just a minute," The Xonver turned to his partner and discussed the matter.
"We can’t do it. It’s to much money. There’s not that much in the entire Galaxy treasury." The two aliens turned to the plutopians.
"No deal. We’ll be leaving and do tell us if you lower your price."
"Oh, we won’t. If anything it’ll rise. There are 10 Plutopian super ships landed in the Southern Hemisphere. Our algae plantation have already been started." Silently, the two Xonvers reboarded their ship and took the transporter back to Planet Xonver. (Transporters are huge facilities in which large spacecraft can be instantly transported to other transporters. Transporters are very expensive machinery, so only wealthy planets own them. They are good for trade though, since it saves energy and fuel bills to travel along transporters, planet with transporters usually get money from trade ships that fly through the transporters to sell their goods. And buy goods as well.)

Location: aboard a super Xonver ship.

Hetty once again glanced around the room. It was made of gray metal, and the only opening was the wooden door. Quietly, he gave it a push. The door swung open freely revealing another room filled with computers and a huge hat rack.
"Weird. I wonder where this is. Not Pluto that’s for sure." Hetty walked across the room and noticed a sign on a drawer. Planet Xonver, it read.
"Hmm...Xonver eh? I’ve read about this place. Supposed to be the second most advanced planet in the Galaxy. People here look much like humans except they have green nails." The tall man reached into one of the drawers and took out a bottle of green nail polish. He painted the liquid onto his fingernails and put on a pair of sunglasses. Last, he reached up towards the wall and pulled a 4-foot gun off some hooks. He tucked it in his shirt and left the room.

Location: Earth

"Dad! You didn’t die! Did you know mom died? Did you know, she did everyone else in Wheaten." Whoops, let me rephrase that.
"So did you know that she died. So did everyone else in Wheaten. Let me give you a hug!" Cody ran up to his dad and began to hug him. (You can see what a few typing errors can do to a story. Change the entire meaning of a sentence)
"Get away from me kid. I don’t want you to hug me; I’m just here okay. Don’t touch me."
"Oh...err...sorry dad."
"Don’t call me dad either. I’ve decided that for now on, you should call me...The Bullfighter!"
"Why?"
"Cause I said so. Got that boy? You’d better had got that. Now get away from me." Cody walked away and climbed back into the SUV. The boy that had once lay trapped inside the base drum sat in one of the seat next to another boy just like him, and another, and another. There were a total of four.
"HI Jake. Who are these people?"
"Those? Oh, those are my long lost twin brothers. They were in the base drum with me. I used to think they were clones of me, but when we all took a bath inside the drum, I noticed we had different birth marks on our butts."
"I see."
"Yeah, want some chicken?" Jake handed Cody a half-bitten drumstick.
"Thanks." Cody took the drumstick and bit of some of the meat. After he had polished off the bone, he tossed in out the window. The two boys got into a game of ‘guess what I’m thinking that your thinking that I’ thinking’ and they played until night fall. Then, they went to sleep in the same car seat. Quite disturbing isn’t it?

Location: Planet Xonver

"Hi, I’m here take the next shift."
"Really? Don’t recognize you. You new here?"
"Err...Yeah"
"Hmm, well. Let me show you the ropes. Pretty much, all you do is sit here and make sure the red alarm doesn’t go off. IF it does, you call home base. Get it?"
"Yeah"
"Good, now, normally you have to log in your secret password and username. Not to mention you have to breathe into the microphone, say the password, type in the code, and show the computer your handprint. However, since you’re new, I’ll let you stay logged in on my account. It’ much easier. It’s usually halfway through the shift by the time you log in."
"Thanks"
‘Bye" The Xonver left the room without a drip of suspicion. Once at the computer, Hetty created a new account. This account was programmed to allow him access to the computer in case he needed to take over the ship. This species seemed to be helping him defeat Pluto but there’s always those ‘ifs’. Better to play it safe, right?" Oh there was one more thing, he went into he sleeping chamber and murdered the yellow-suited man during his shift. Thought you might want to know that.

Location: Cambridge, Maryland

"So, dad, I was wondering if we should go somewhere together before we have to head out towards NASA headquarters."
"NO, get away from me slob"
"Slob? I thought dad’s were supposed to love their sons"
"Well, guess what. I’m not your dad."
"Yeah you are!" Cody once again tried to hug the guy. Just then, the Iraqi walked into the room.
"What’s up guys?" he said.
"I’m not a guy! I’m a woman!" (Just to let you know this is Cody’s supposedly dad talking.) The Iraqi choked on a mouthful of slurpee he had just drank.
‘What! Did you just say you were a woman Mr.?"
"I’m not Mr. I’m Mrs.! My name’s Mrs. Beane!" The guy who was supposed to Cody’s dad peeled of a mask and a body suit revealing Thompson’s Language arts teacher.
"Wait a minute here!" Cody began, "If your Mrs. Beane, then who’s my dad?"
"I am!" Jim Lehrer walked into the room peeling off a mask revealing a man that looked like Cody’s dad.
"What! Let me get this straight. My fake dad, is Mrs. Beane. And Jim Lehrer is my real dad. Correct?" Mrs. Beane walked into the middle of the room and cleared her throat,
"Wrong, here’s how it goes. Your fake dad is really Jim Lehrer disguised as Mrs. Beane." Mrs. Bean took off another mask and another body suit revealing the news guy, Jim Lehrer.
"Now I’m really confused. Does anyone have anymore masks on?" The Iraqi scratched his chin, then spoke up,
"Oh, yeah. Sorry, I’ve got one on. See, I’m not really Iraqi, I’m actually pediatrician from Italy. See?" The man peeled off a mask. Then, none other than Jake berry walked in the room.
‘Hi guys. What’s with the doctor and the costumes on the floor?
"Nothing Jake. It was nothing."
"Were you talking about me?"
"NO""Yes, you were. I know it! I don’t like being left out, your keeping secrets from me!! I wanna kill you!!!! Isn’t it weird that I for some reason feel like snapping my fingers right now?" Jake snapped his fingers and the pediatrician died.
"Cool, I’m a super duper pooper now. That’s what my mom said anyway, she said only super duper poopers could snap their fingers. Jake walked back out the door and back into the car to take a nap.
I know this doesn’t seem like an end. But, alas it is. Planet Xonver has not yet delivered the one third of the earth’s population onto earth yet. Miguel Aguado is on Jupitoan ship heading for earth. He plans to reach earth, search for survivors then get some warships from the abandoned warship factory on Mars. (Built by the Yellow-suited man) Anyway, Hetty has worked his way up to second in command in the ‘save earth’ project on Xonver. He has gotten new purple contact lenses so he’ll be able to fit in better. As for Pluto, they have taken over the entire South American continent with algae plantations and cattle farms. Cody’s cat died from rabies on June 6th. Did I tell you he skipped school on June 6th and 7th as well? His school has school on the 7th, unlike ours. Oh yeah, A super ship is a spaceship with all you need to survive aboard. It has a crop chamber to grow crops; it’s own water recycling system, and a mini transporter onboard. This transporter can only transport objects as big as 1 elephant. Nothing bigger. It’s good for getting supplies and sending more men.

P.S. This document has been written by Nicholas Makara. Visit the Hetty site, it’s great!

P.S.S. Only Plutopians can kill people by snapping their fingers